A father son evening...

Zoë has a bit of a fever and as a result missed Sunday evening services. Jason and I went and afterwards he wanted to practice church. So, I sat in the front pew and he got up on stage and led a song (mansions over the hilltop). It went something like this:

I have a mansion
I want to go there
I hope we make it

Next he asked me to get out my chapters. (My Bible?) Yes, everybody get out your chapters. (What chapter?) Uhhh, uhm... uh... uh... Batman chapter 2.

After a quick sermon (which I believe involved ninjas and a sword fight), he led a prayer, which went something like this:

Dear God,
Thank you for our blessings.
Thank you for [~~~unintelligible~~~]
Amen

So, the cycle continued like that for quite a while. Song, sermon, prayer, song, sermon, prayer. The songs eventually devolved. I believe the songs were:

• Mansion Over The Hilltop
• I'm Happy Today
• Spiderman
• The Theme From Superman (by John Williams)
• Batman Ninja Fight

I suspect he was just making that last one up. The prayers however, actually got better. I told him he was doing good and that I bet he could do prayers for the food at our meals. So, then his prayer was:

Dear God,
Thank you for our blessings.
Thank you for [~~~unintelligible~~~]
Amen
Thank you for the food.
Amen

I then suggested that he should pray for Zoë to get better from being sick:

Dear God,
Thank you for Zoë...for her getting better...
Help Zoë getting better
Help my sister getting better
Thank you for the food
Amen

Then we went to McDonalds and had a vicious game of airhockey.

-J

Stopped in West, TX

It's a Czechoslovakian city. They have really good baked goods. Anyhow. Jason was being a crazy man. He made a bathroom stop take about twice as long as it should. I finally ended up needing to take the kids out of the store. I asked Jason why he was being so bad. He said he was being good.

Justin - "No you're not. You're jumping up and down. You're pulling things off the shelf. You're not coming when you're called."
...
Justin - "You know; mom is buying a cinimon roll for you and Zoë. I bet Zoë would like the whole thing. Zoë, would you eat the whole thing?"
(vigorous nodding)
Justin - "Mom and dad are getting something else. We don't want the cinnimon roll. But, I'm not going to give it to a boy who's going to keep being bad."
...
Justin - "Now, are you going to be good?"
Jason - "Yes, I'm going to be good."
Justin - "What are you going to do to be good?"
Jason - "I'm going to p*ay to be good."
Justin - "You're going to play to be good?"
Jason - "I'm going to pray to be good."
I doubt I was able to conceal the look of surprise on my face.
Justin - "That's a good answer. You be good, okay?"
Jason - "Okay."

-J

This old house.

Apparently, any time we go somewhere for an extended period of time, and it isn't someone else's house, it becomes our new house. Jason asked where the van was. I said we left it at our house. "Our old house?", he questioned.

I tried to explain it to him in more detail, but he was distracted buying bootleg DVDs and knockoff Power Rangers in Mexico.

Babie, Girlie, Baby, Girly

You see what I mean. Adding "ie" or "y" to a word just isn't manly. Cutie. Booty. And Jason figured this out. That's when he made a life decision. He didn't decide to try something out. He decided how the world was, and if he was a man, then this was a change he had to make. So, he now says, "I need to go pot." Men go to the pot. Girls and babies go to the potty. Men go to the pot.

-J

Ding (cue the lightbulb)

Jason had a lightbulb go off today. I'm not sure what caused it, but he sat down on a swing today and figured out how to swing himself. At first he was just doing his body, but within a few minutes he had the legs figured out too. We'd worked on the legs a lot...so when he had the body down, finally the legs thing made sense. Now, he nearly flipped over backwards a few times, but he's got it figured out. We got Zoë in a swing, so he could teach her. She gets the concept, but isn't as adept. It's only fair he teach her. After all, she just taught him how to jump on one foot. Perhaps not as cool, but you can only swing on swings...you can jump on one foot anywhere.

-J

P.S.

P.S. They are real Bibles. They aren't picture books. They have the text of the bible and the only "pictures" are the maps in the back.

I just hope they survive long enough for them to learn to read.

Bibles

I bought the kids their first Bibles. I'm hopeful that they are old enough that they won't destroy them. I got a case for Zoë's. Jason's is hardback. I told them both that they are not to draw in them.

We'll see.

They are ridiculously cute.

This is Zoë's



This is Jason's



Click those for more info.

I really liked the translation. It's not quite as precise as I like...but then again, when I'm talking with the kids, I'm not as precise as I would like. I found it to be rather true for how simple it was attempting to make the language. One passage in particular read something like

"Respect God and obey his commandments. This is the most important thing."

As opposed to

"Fear God and keep his commandments. For, this is man's all."

Anyhow. Their first Bibles. It's a cool thing.

-Justin

Baseball game was pretty sweet...

The Rangers and the Indians both have some pretty lousy pitching. That spells "High Scoring Game". In fact, they pulled the Indian's pitcher in the third inning after he'd already given up nine runs.

Jason doesn't like the fireworks, and he got his wish. It was too windy and dry for fireworks. In fact the stadium got a wave of smoke around the 8th inning, from grass fires.

Ranger's won 12 to 8. There were a ton of homeruns. Seven, if memory serves. The Indians got four, two of which were multiscoring and they still lost.

Jason got to play some of the outfield games. He hit off of a tee. He pitched. He hit off of a different tee. He pitched with a slingshot.

He liked everything...well everything except an overly friendly horse. The mascott rubbed his head as we were walking to get cotton candy. I think he thought it was me, but then turned and saw a ginormous horse man. He then became a wailing semi-permanent attachment to my leg.

He didn't even eat his cotton candy or watch the last two innings of the game. He just kept looking over his shoulder for horses.

We had two close calls with foul balls. The first one I would have had to jump for, and after last season's bruise, I was less vigorous. (I was still vigorous enough to get ketchup and mustard on my clothes. Stupid hotdog.) The second one; the guy sitting right behind Jason caught it. We had four others come into our section, but none of them were close.

I'm glad my only other day game is in May...it's already getting hot.

-Justin

Jason - Look! There's a junebug in that seat. I squished it.
(Justin picked it up.)
Justin - This is a rasin.
Jason - Oh.
Justin - Did you squish it?
Jason - Yes.
Justin - Why?
Jason - Because it was a junebug.
Justin - When you squish a junebug, it becomes a rasin?
(Jason looks at the rasin and then back at Justin.)
Jason - I guess.

Hey little man.

Bonny - Are you a big man?
Jason - Yes.
Bonny - Are you a big strong handsome man?
Jason - Yes, that's why I have to eat so much.

A Testament to Her Health

Jason and Bonny are talking. Bonny is sitting on the couch and Jason is sitting on her left leg. Bonny readjusts herself and shifts Jason to her right leg. A little while later a realization comes to Jason's face.

Jason - Is that your hurt leg? (Pointing to the left leg)
Bonny - No, that's not my hurt leg?
Jason - Is that your hurt leg? (Pointing to the right leg; the one he's on.)
Bonny - Yes, that's my hurt leg?
Jason's eyes widden. He's agast. He's worried. He looks betrayed. He's not allowed to touch mommy's hurt leg. He gets in trouble for touching it.
Jason - You put me here!!!

Gasp...mommy's trying to get him in trouble. :)

That's good news though. She must be doing better. Now if she can just keep Zoë from kicking her knee, she may heal completely.

Latest news is she made it to five degrees. The goal is at least zero degrees, maybe a bit less. Last time my knees were measured they were at negative three and negative one degrees. I was told negative five is considered ideal. So, she's getting there.

-J